Dark and Unadulterated

07.18.2005 02:54:00 pm

{XX}death …it’s the consequence of being hurt, damaged, lost,rejected… and then the feelings of numbness..and then being hopeful for nothingness and blackness…the soul can’t pray, no matter how it tries…feelings of helplessness…a lost appetite for life…Death is inevitable!

06.04.2005 12.08:21 am

what a boring night..rolling and rolling on my bed.. bored to death..dreaming of what could have been..and then chasing my dreams away..O what a night! reminiscing and then feeling nothing..just an emptiness i could not quite understand..it’s like the lightness and nothingness of my being..puffing away the boredom, destroying my soul and leading it to the abyss.. Oh what a life! what happened?

05.13.05 01:01:12 am

Lucid morning..
dark shadows..oh where are you? trembling..washing away the purity as if my dreams melted right before my eyes..waiting and waiting but I got tired..REGRET! Ah that’s what i feel..Realization: that i was naive after all… and you took that away from me..can i have it back?..but where are you? my soul is crying..guilt deep down the recesses of my mind..can this just be a dream? Oh God, please let it be!

25.11.09 11.18pm

trapped…i am trapped..wanting to get out…wading & wading..before i drown..but there’s an urge to dive back and be out of air..to numb the pain..and only gasp for air when i can only feel nothing but the beating of my calm heart..

23.11.2009 11:50 a.m.

tired and broken..cycle of life..never ending..i guess this is how to live in this life they call “REALITY”. i’m just so tired..so tired..meaningless interaction..meaningless..meaningless..that’s what it was..but life must go on!